I recently sat at church listening to a great sermon but something strange happened in my mind. So strange I had to pick up a pen and write down my thoughts. The Pastor was talking about how we inform God but we don’t consult God. We go to Him with our agenda and our choices and expect Him to bless it.
The Pastor used an example that he encounters often of a couple that came into his office asking for premarital counseling. The first thing the pastor asked ask them, is if they are prepared to cancel or post pone the wedding, if in this counseling session it is determined they are not ready to marry. He said 95% of the time they respond, “We already booked the venue, and the caterer- No”. The pastor then responds with, “then you’re not here for counseling, you’re here to inform me of your arrangements”.
While he shared the story, I will admit a little pride rose in me as I knew I was of the 5% that was willing to cancel if he said we were not ready or even worse not meant to be. It was then my mind went down memory lane and I missed half the sermon to this overwhelming amount of thoughts.
The first was of a night I fell asleep on the couch and found myself dreaming that my daughter was an adult and on her way to meet a boy. When I woke up, my teenager was walking down the stairs and everything happened like a Deja vu and I asked her,"who are you skipping school with?". In that exact moment her body language changed to pure outrage as she thought her friends told me.
The next was of a time of heart break. I was dating Richard and we were both praying that God would reveal to both of us if we should pursue marriage. Everything on my end came back with,
“Daughter I charge thee, not to awaken love till its ready to be awaken”
He felt like I rejected him. So I disregarded the message and ended up severely heart broken. I should've listened.
The next was of my previous post I shared with all of you, of the man I was dating that God revealed there was death inside. The man I was dating was practicing Santeria. I know all of these sounds crazy. There are moments I feel like I am going crazy. But every single one of those moments was RIGHT!
Then there was the time where I was reluctant and would have missed on something great. I thought I knew better than to get involved with my friend Clark who had a history of being quite the heart breaker. But everything lead to a yes. I questioned God, “Are you serious?” Today I have to be honest and say, I can’t wish for better than what God gave me in my husband. God was clear that He had prepared Clark for me, and me for Clark.
And then it hit me like a flood as I sat there in the church pew. It was as if God said, “Have I ever steered you wrong? Consult with me, and trust my decisions even when it hurts”. It was for a job offer that seemed perfect.
People always pray, “God if it’s for me open the doors” but I realized that even the enemy opens the doors too.
Not everything that is good, is from God. I turned down the job, cause everything in me said it was the wrong move. In one moment I was clear that God said no and I turned it down at that moment. Why? Because I had the strength and clarity in that moment. Then the next day, I doubted the moment of clarity. Hey… I’m human. The coolest part about it, was that he keeps validating me through the season of doubt. Sometimes in a bible scripture, at times with a friend, other times listening to a sermon. I think I would get frustrated if I saved someone from a bad choice and they regretted it daily. I have so much to learn.
Sister- Don't inform God; consult with Him first!